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Cock Gobbling

I tell ya, after a long, hard day, there's nothing more satisfying than coming home, heating up my oven, and shoving a big ol' cock in there for a while. Always perks me right up, even after those exhausting 15-hour shifts I've been working lately.

There's really no better feeling than some warm, juicy cock sliding into your mouth. Its delicate warmth, with the right amount of moisture, is sure to melt all your trubles away.

Here are a few of my favorite cock preparations. Be sure to give them a go next time you've got a burning craving for some cock.

Cock Balls
(also known as Cock Bites)

Personally, I'm always in the mood for a little bit of cock, and that's exactly what these little guys offer. Just a little bit of cock.

These powerful balls of cock goodness are absolutely bursting with cock flavor. Maybe even more than one mouth could possibly handle.

These little treats are perfect for getting some of your still unconvinced friends and family into the joys of wolfing down a cock or two. They only offer a brief nibble or two of cock, but sometimes that's all one needs. The effects near instantaneous, and are certainly long-lasting and memorable.

So, if you've got a friend or two who are still riding the fence about whether to hop on top of the new cock craze, give 'em a mouth full of your cock balls and see how quickly they change their mind.

Sweet 'n' Sour Cock

A delicious cock variety for you indecisive types.

With so many types of delicious cock out there, sometimes a girl just can't make up her mind! It can be maddening, I tell ya! MADDENING! It's a damn good thing we have the geniuses that thought of Sweet 'n' Sour cock, or else I'd spend hours poking and prodding and staring at cocks until I could figure out exactly which one I wanted.

Sweet 'n' Sour Cock is great for anytime, though. No need to be indecisive like me in order to enojoy it. Just pop some of that warm, delicious cock up in your mouth and be instantly taken into cock paradise as the gentle sweet flavors of the cock's special sauce spread across your taste buds. Then feel your mind be blown over and over again, as the sweet flavors give way to a gently sour goodness that's neither too pronounced, nor too subtle.

Buffalo Cock

Firstly, this shouldn't be confused with Byron Hulcher's Cock, that's a different Buffalo Cock entirely. The Buffalo Cock we're talking about here just so happens to be some of the hottest cock you'll ever wrap your lips around, believe me.

You can blow this cock all you want, it's not gonna help. I've tried blowing this cock for hours on end and no matter what I do, it stays hot. You really need to know what you're getting yourself into when trying to handle this hot cock.

This isn't cock meant for the cock amatuer. This is professional-level cock that "bites back" you could say. Once you've got this cock in your mouth, there's no turning back. You're there for the long ride and you're just going to have to endure the burn until this cock's finished.

Everybody likes a good, spicy cock every now and then, but again, we must emphasize that going after Buffalo Cock is something suited only to true cock-masters, such as yours truly.

Beer-Battered Cock

Some cocks just need a little more love than others, and in the case of Beer-Battered Cock, the need for love should seem quite obvious from the outset.

My friends, this cock selection brings up a terrible, yet all-too-real truth of the cock world. A seedy underbelly that most of us would love to pretend doesn't exist, but that's simply shielding your eyes from the real world. The truth you find here is cock abuse.

Beer-Battered Cock isn't the kind of cock that needs any kind of beating or choking, it just needs your tender loving care while you delicately let its unique texture and flavors permeate through your mouth. As its unimistakable flavors dance around on your tongue, simply enjoy the one of a kind enjoyment this dish can bring.

Some may take issue with how tender and soft it is all the time, but trust me, those who pass up some Beer-Battered chicken are clearly missing out. Once you've had even just a little, you simply must have your fill.

Cock in White Sauce

Now here's a classic I'm sure everyone can agree on.

Admittedly, this was the easiest selection to add to the list. I know it just happened to you, because it happens to me all the time. Your eyes caught a glimpse of that big batch of beautiful cocks slathered in that white sauce and the craving for cock just hit an all-time high. There is no meter in existence that can measure your desire for cock now.

Though I've always seen cocks slathered in white sauce as a fairly common thing, Alabama seems to like to claim this one as a speciality. I say to Alabama, "Look around, jackass! You can find cock in white sauce anywhere you go in the world. It doesn't just belong to you."

Anyway, while it seems like such a simple dish, there's simply nothing better than biting into some nice and juicy cock as some of that warm and gooey white sauce drips down your chin a little bit onto the plate.

So nostalgic.

These are only a few of the finer cock preparations out there. People the world over have been enjoying cock throughout human history, and the advancement of cultures and innovations in preparation have made cock one of the most versatile dishes on the planet.

If you wanna get your lips around some moist, hot, and juicy cock, then there's certainly something out there sure to delight your taste buds. Just grab as much cock as you can, stuff it in your mouth, and see what sticks.

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